When Hurt Helps Write a Different Story

Hurt is one of the unfortunate parts of life. At some point, we will all be hurt, cause hurt, be reminded of it at unwelcome times, and have to learn to work through it by forgiving, asking for forgiveness, and participating in the continual-ness of forgiveness. No part of it is really fun, but it will happen. You will be hurt. You will hurt.

More than once, and sometimes very deeply.

It is usually hard to make sense of hurt, to understand what, if any, purpose it holds. I’m not sure “hurt” and “making sense” are concepts that can be completely harmonized.

Sometimes though, there comes a time when you begin writing a story that feels similar to one that’s been written before. But the last one, perhaps through words and actions of your own, others, or some combination of both, took some ugly turns.


Left, right, up, and down. All over.

I don’t know that I can truthfully say I’m thankful for such stories in my life, but oh, have I learned from them. For that, I can be thankful.

Because this time, I can do things differently. I can choose different words. I can choose different actions, reactions, attitudes. This time, I’m letting past hurt help a present story turn out differently.

It’s not that all hurt can be avoided. Going to excessive lengths to avoid hurt can result in ugliness of its own, drawing into ourselves and missing out on the beauty of honesty and vulnerability. Some hurt isn’t a result of choices of our own.

But sometimes we have the opportunity to make new choices that make way for a new story. They are not always easy, popular, or fun choices–but they are good. And they are writing this story differently.

Til next time…


p.s. How has past hurt taught you to do things differently?

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