In less than 2 months, I will be a college graduate.
My entire life has been dictated by the school calendar. Before I was in school, my older siblings already were, so for the twenty-two years of my existence my years have stretched from September to May, with three months “off” for summer. Three months off from life, it seemed, as the rhythm of school seemed to be the “real” thing.
Soon though, my life will take on a completely new rhythm. New Year’s will suddenly hold new meaning, instead of just being a marker that Christmas break was almost over–it will finally truly be a marker of a new year, instead of the new notebooks and pencils in September that I have known. Back to school specials will cease to bring a wave of irritation and excitement at the thought of a new school year. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and spring breaks will become a thing of the past, remembered with wistfulness as I read others’ Facebook statuses anticipating these wondrous events.
It would only take a brief glance of a handful of posts on here to realize something about me: I handle change about as well as a four-year-old handles a cell phone. Functionally, maybe, but certainly not with the adeptness required to excel in life. Graduation will most likely not find me curled in the fetal position, unable to walk across the stage; nor will I skip across without a thought of what I’m leaving behind.
No more class, no more occasional breaks or days off, no more having to carve out hours of time to write papers and study for tests. There is goodness here, but unfamiliarity as well; and with that, apprehension. Should I get a full time job soon after graduation, I don’t know how I’ll handle working 8-5 five days a week, with only weekends and the occasional vacation day off. I may get bored by such consistency.
Then again, if I don’t get a full time job for a while, I’m not sure how I’ll handle NOT having consistency.
I’m not sure how I’ll handle a lot of thing, really.
Tis’ the season for change, for new and unfamiliar patterns.
Here’s to em, I suppose.
Til next time…